My World of Dreams & Wishes-

Tuesday, August 21, 2007
-6:38 PM-

Hey people! I know this blog is kinda dead... I haven't been blogging for so long I've lost count! I have decided to revive it. I'm not in a "flare mood" now but erm... I believe some stuff would eventually come to my mind... I find it very ironic. Last time I use to sit at my computer all week waiting for Jonathan Leong to post something on his blog thinking: what is he doing? All he has to do is sing! Can't he find the time to blog? Well I finally realise that.. sure he can find the time to blog but during his spare time, he is worrying about when he would be kicked out... etc. Cause right now I'm kinda feeling the same. Insecure. Sure, I'm in the school team now and I am not the worst on the team.. but I'm so afraid that I'll become bad... deprove that is... cause lately, my performance has been on and off and I CAN'T CONTROL IT! Thats the worst part! It's like when I want myself to play well, I end up playing like crap but when I'm matches which are not competitions, I end up playing well. -.-" I hate myself! Its like when ever I enter the court for a competition, I get so frighten. Frighten that I'll let my team down, frighten that I'll let my coach down and frighten that I'll let myself down. Studies wise I'm also deproving. I just don't have the mood to study. I know thats a bad excuse and all but its true. After I revise for a while, my mind drifts off to something I'm more interested about. Oh yeah side track for awhile. Today, when I went to my class, no one was inside. I started panicking and thought are they all pulling a prank on me or what? Then I sudden realised that everyone had gone to swimming PE! Being the calm person I am, I immediately ran to the general office and told my problem to the woman at the counter I begging her to give me Ms Su's number so she dialed the number and passed the phone to me. When someone picked up, I blurted out "Ms Su! I'm at school! I forgot there was swimming PE today!" Then there was this man voice which went "who are you? From what class?"Mr Khoo! That was not the end of the embarrassment! I had to go to 1D and look for ariel and beg to let me stand with her class. She laughed. How comforting. Well at least she let me stand with her class but I felt so awkward standing there! So then it was the long wait. I spent most sleeping and studying for chem.( hehe you should do what I did if you need more time to study for a test on tuesday the next time HAHA!) So then when everyone came back they were like... Where were you?*blush blush* so embarrassing! haha Ok.. I know that was supposet to be a side track and I was suppose to go back to the main topic but I'm too embarrassed to post anymore so bye
*blush blush*

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